# Who you are now

For the first couple of years it is the first fact about you. It fades, slower than you want, and mostly because of what you build.

## The first couple of years — It's the first fact about you

It's in every job interview, every date, every awkward pause when somebody asks what you've been up to.

## Then it isn't — That fades

Slower than you want, and it does fade. At some point it turns into a thing that happened instead of the thing you are.

The switch is mostly about how much other stuff you've built since.

## Two ways to get stuck — What to watch for

One is letting it become your whole identity, even in a good way. Being the guy who went to prison and came back is a story, and it's yours to tell, but it's a small box to live in.

The other is pretending it didn't happen. That takes energy forever and it breaks badly when somebody finds out.

## The target — Somewhere in between

A person who did a thing, paid for it, learned from it, and is now busy with something else.

Most people get there. It just takes longer than anybody tells you.

## That's the guide — Most people get there

It just takes longer than anybody tells you. Ask about early termination, keep paying the restitution, tell your PO before they find out, and spend the rest of it building the thing that eventually outranks the article.

**Need help with this? Just ask.**

These pages cover the general rules. Your situation has details they don't. Email me a question. **Answers are free** , and "you don't need to pay anyone for this" is my most common answer.

[josh@federalprisondude.com](mailto:josh@federalprisondude.com?subject=Once%20you%27re%20out%20question)

I answer in the order received, usually within a couple of days. I have a day job. If your situation genuinely needs more than an email, I take a limited number of consults, so say so and we'll work it out.