Skip to main content
Federal prison FAQ

Fights, safety, and conflict

The thing you are most afraid of is not the thing most likely to happen to you. What the real risks are, and what stepping into one costs.

The odds

What is actually likely to happen to you

Am I going to get jumped?

Copy link

Probably not.

How do I get some action?

Copy link

Go to the yard.

Do I need to lift weights to be safe?

Copy link

No.

What if I'm small, old, or young?

Copy link

I am small and I was fine.

Nobody is going to bother an old man.

Young is the hard one, because your judgment is the thing most likely to get you hurt and it is also the thing least developed.

If it comes anyway

Standing in it

What do I do if someone steps to me?

Copy link

Stand your ground.

Do I have to fight if I'm challenged?

Copy link

Pretty much.

What if I've never been in a fight?

Copy link

You may end up in your first one.

I did not, and I am five foot five and a corny-ass white dude. So it is not a given.

What happens if I refuse to fight?

Copy link

Downstream social consequences. Not violence — standing.

Which is a real cost and a survivable one. Before you decide it is not, read what the alternative costs: what conflict costs does the arithmetic in days.

Can I check in or go PC?

Copy link

You can. Understand what it means: you will sit in the SHU, and if you want to get shipped somewhere else you will refuse to return to the compound three times in thirty-day increments, meaning about ninety days in isolation. Eventually they will send you to another facility.

It is a real option and it is an expensive one. Checking in also follows you to the next place.

Your paperwork

What people find out about you

What if someone finds out about my case?

Copy link

Depends entirely on your case. For most financial and drug cases, nothing happens.

How that first conversation goes, and how to answer it, is in the role.

What if I'm a cop, military, or former prosecutor?

Copy link

Military, you are fine.

Law enforcement or prosecution is a genuine safety issue and one of the few real ones. Talk to your attorney about it before sentencing, because it affects designation.

That is not a favor you are asking for. It is a documented input to where the Bureau sends you, and the policy is PS 5100.08. Raising it after you are designated is much harder than raising it before.

What if I cooperated?

Copy link

Do your best to avoid getting your paperwork checked.

This is a conversation to have with your attorney before sentencing rather than with me afterward, because what ends up in the public record is decided at sentencing.

Should I get a tattoo?

Copy link

Your call, I am not your mother. Two things to know before you decide: shared needles are a hepatitis C vector and that is not theoretical inside, and tattooing is a prohibited act, so it is a shot if you are caught.

Next section — part 9 of 16

Getting in trouble

Shots, hearings, the hole, and how much good time a bad twenty seconds costs. Most of these numbers are set by regulation, so they are knowable in advance.

For your people

Hand the rest of this site to your family

You will not be able to look things up once you're inside. They can, and this is where: everything written for the one waiting — a twelve-part guide to mail, visiting, money, and your release date, plus their own FAQ and checklist. Alongside it, a guide to every facility with email alerts when visiting stops, the support group directory, calculators for your release math, and free answers when they have questions.

Send them the link before you report, not after they can't reach you.

Need help with this? Just ask.

These pages cover the general rules. Your situation has details they don't. Email me a question. Answers are free, and "you don't need to pay anyone for this" is my most common answer.

josh@federalprisondude.com

I answer in the order received, usually within a couple of days. I have a day job. If your situation genuinely needs more than an email, I take a limited number of consults, so say so and we'll work it out.

Pass it on

If this answered something, it'll answer it for someone else too.